Are you still holding onto a secret? Maybe it’s a lie you’ve told, an abortion, debt or an affair that you’ve had.
Your secret may be something that you’ve done in your past, or it may be a secret thought about yourself that you’ve been holding on to.
“I’m not good enough.”
“I shouldn’t have been born.”
“The world doesn’t have anything better for me.”
“I just don’t fit in.”
All these secrets start to become a lens that you see the world through. And those thoughts you’ve been having about yourself can quickly become the glass ceiling that you live up to.
Whatever your secret is… Whatever has been holding you back… It’s time to break free!
Stage Eight: Stop Creating Secrets
In my book, Break Free From Your Dirty Little Secrets: A New You In 10 Secret-Breaking Stages, you’ll learn to walk through 10 stages that will help you break free from all your secrets.
Let’s talk about stage eight – stop creating secrets…
When you try to become less of a secret keeper, you’ll likely step on a few landmines along the way. So, you’ll want to be prepared for those ahead of time.
Your False Self
One of the landmines you’re likely to step on is staying in your false self. What does this mean, exactly?
As you hold onto your secrets, you’re creating a false image of yourself. The longer you hold on to that image, the more your mind will start to believe that it’s real, tricking you in the process.
Smaller Living
Another landmine that you’ll possibly step on in your journey to break free is staying in smaller living. Let’s explore this deeper…
When you hold on to old resentments or keep grudges (of yourself or others), you’re inadvertently attaching yourself to that secret. In other words, you’re “staying in smaller living”.
The good news is that you can fix both of these “landmines” by learning to practice forgiveness!
Learning to Forgive
You can break free from your secrets by learning to forgive. Forgive yourself. Forgive others. This isn’t always easy, but it is possible.
Choosing to forgive doesn’t mean that you’re condoning what you’ve done in your past (or what someone else has done to you). It simply means that you’re making a conscious decision to move past it and put it behind you.
Let’s talk about how you can learn to forgive yourself…
- Think about your secrets. Really think about them.
- Write a letter to yourself. Thank yourself for all the ways you’ve helped yourself to be in the world. Forgive yourself for not knowing what you didn’t know then.
Let’s talk about how you can learn to forgive others…
- Understand that it’s hard to forgive others, but it is possible. Acknowledge what they did to you.
- Think about how you can heal from what they did to you. What do you need?
- Write a letter to the person/people who hurt you. Write it as if you intend to give it to them, but you never actually have to do so. Allow this letter to release them from what they did to you. Better yet, allow it to release yourself from the heavy burdens it has plagued you with until now.
Moving Forward
You can’t move forward if you’re holding on to the hurts of your past. Forgiveness is the key to your door of freedom.
To truly get free, try practicing this advice – write those letters. Allow each word you write to release a little bit more of that weight you’ve been carrying around for so long.
Remember, forgiveness doesn’t mean you’re condoning the things that caused you hurt, it just means you’re choosing to move forward instead.
