Are You Living a Life of Design or Default?

Are you living a life of design or default?

Are you living a life of design or a life of default.  What’s the difference? A life of design is powerful. It’s a life created from your future self that you start making decisions to step into today. It’s a life where you are in the driver’s seat and are actively designing your actions and roadmap rather than reacting to the curves that life will inevitably throw at you. On the other hand, living a life of default is quite similar to the life you’re living today. It’s probably pretty good and you are mostly happy, and if you keep on doing what you’re doing, you will cruise along and have pretty much the same day-to-day wins and frustrations that you do now. There’s nothing wrong with a life of default, except… might be missing out on the hope or dream that has been buried underneath the bills, responsibilities, job, kids, and other minutiae that makes up this great big kaleidoscope called life.

If you’re like most people, you probably want more but aren’t sure how to get there. Every time you start, you get derailed. Your idea sounds silly, even to you (and yet you want it). I work with clients all the time to help them dust off their dream or desire and make it a reality. It’s time to discover your Paris, the thing you really want that might feel far away. While it may not be Paris for you, it might be a book, a new career, a more fulfilling relationship, to sail around the world, take a European vacation, or learn about the different religions and their perspectives on death and life. Whatever it is, you can have it – if you are brave enough to step out of default living and into a life of design.

What’s Your Paris?:

To help you build a created future, spend some time thinking or journaling about the following:

  1. What dream or desire do you have that you’ve put on hold or let go of because of time, resources, knowledge, or your beliefs about it?
  2. If in three years from now you were talking to a friend and telling them it was the best year of your life personally and professionally, what would you be saying?
  3. What actions have you already put into motion to create that vision?
  4. What do you need to start saying no to or let go of so that you can make room for your designed life?
  5. What gets in the way of you accomplishing the goals you set out to accomplish? What gets in the way of your Paris?
  6. Who do you want to be by the end of 2022?
  7. What do you need to start doing to invite your future self in?
  8. Whose permission do you need to make these changes?

Ten years ago, I was 37, working as a publicist, with a 7-year-old and a 5-year-old. Ten years ago, I had a book I wanted to write and a life I wanted more from. Ten years ago, I wasn’t a coach. Ten years ago, I didn’t think of myself as a creative person. Ten years ago, I hadn’t  let go of my old ideas. 

I was spending all of my time in combat with life. Existing. And then I had a moment where I knew I wanted more. Something shifted. There was an opening. I could have ignored it. It would have been easy to do. Thankfully, I didn’t. I wanted to be fulfilled, secure, and even cheerful. I wanted to be a good mom, have a happy marriage, and get my finances in order. I wanted to serve people in a big way. And I wanted my dream of writing. To do those things was a tall order but I went for it. I started making choices to say no to anything that wasn’t supporting my big vision. I began walking in integrity with what I said I wanted. I took action by investing my time and resources into designing my Paris. It’s your turn. Will you take it?

Another year has started. How will you lasso in your designed future? 

As a gift to you, please download my ebook, Living a Life of Design Rather than Default.

I’ll leave you with this, would your future self be happy with the decisions you’re making today? If not, change it.

Here’s to a kick-butt 2022!

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