New Year, New Story
The new year has finally arrived. We’ve put away our Christmas tree decorations, taken down the lights, and embraced the responsibility that comes with settling back into our normal routine. Perhaps we’ve made resolutions, or we’ve decided to make at least one goal a priority for 2019.
Mostly, it’s chilly and dark, and we find ourselves gravitating toward the couch and losing ourselves in our favorite shows. Which is why now is a good time to look at the stories we may be telling ourselves.
Stories are powerful. Who among us doesn’t like to get lost in a story? The urge to tell- and hear – a story is almost as old as time itself. Think of your one friend who’s an amazing storyteller. You always want to hang out with them, you can’t get enough of them, because they have you on the edge of their seat, rapt with attention, your mouth hanging out, thinking “No way!” You believe everything that comes out of their mouth.
Guess what? You are telling yourself a story all the time. About yourself. And it’s just as engaging. The only thing is, it’s probably not true.
The stories I tell myself usually use the words “always” or “never.” As in, “Because I always do ________, life can’t really change.” Or “Because I screwed this up before, better to not even try.” My stories dig up old mistakes, pressing fears, and vague what-ifs. They weave in a few incidents from my past that remind me of times I failed, and use those to define my entire past, present, and future. They remind me that change isn’t possible, no matter how badly I want it. My stories pretend to have me completely figured out and predicted at every turn.
Which is why, as we go into this new year, it is so important to look at our stories and change them.
Here are three easy steps we can take to rewrite our stories.
- Fact-check. The next time you are aware of your mind telling a story about something you “always” do, ask yourself, “Is this 100% true?” Chances are it isn’t. And if it isn’t, then you know you’ve got a false set of facts on your hand, and that this story is taking you for a ride.
- Re-write. Take five statements you make about yourself all the time – “I’m bad with money,” “I don’t do relationships well,” “I can’t budget my time” – and rewrite them into positives. As in “I am smart with money,” “I am a wonderful partner,” or “I use time efficiently and well.” Even if they may not sound true right now, writing them down tells yourself (and the Universe) that they are.
- Plant the new story. Take your rewritten statements, one by one, and focus on their truth. You might even want to write a sentence or paragraph weaving them all together. As in “I am a genius with money who is an awesome girlfriend who knows exactly how to budget her time. And I deserve love and success and wonderful surprises.” (Cliffhangers and amazing plot developments are optional.)
Make 2019 the year that you pull out a new, better, truer story whenever you face something scary or challenging. If you need more help, schedule a free, thirty-minute consultation with me today. Or consider joining my 2019 World Changers Group. This group is open to 16 people who want to go deeper into their lives, uncover their passion, and figure out what they are meant to do. Each month I will lead a two-hour group coaching call over Zoom, you’ll be assigned an accountability partner, and you will get an individual one-hour coaching session monthly. If this opportunity feels right to you, click here to find out more.
Let’s turn the page together. 2019 is a new chapter. Your story is still unwritten.